Know each other
before you play
Interactive tools that turn awkward conversations into moments of connection. Explore boundaries together.
The problem
Reading about boundaries doesn't build them
The internet is full of articles saying “communicate with your partner.” But no one tells you how. That's why we built interactive tools that guide you through the conversation, step by step.
Articles
Generic advice you read and forget
Tools
Structured workflows you actually complete together
Results
Clear, actionable summaries — not vague suggestions
Our tools
Interactive tools for couples
Start with the free Boundary Checklist. More tools coming soon.
Privacy first
Your privacy is non-negotiable
We built BeforeWePlay with privacy as the foundation.
Anonymous by default
No account, no email, no tracking. Your identity is never connected to your answers.
Data stays on your device
Everything is stored in your browser. Nothing is sent to any server, ever.
Judgment-free design
Warm, approachable, and sex-positive. Built for real humans exploring real desires.
Simple process
How it works
Three steps to clearer communication.
Choose your categories
Select the types of activities you want to explore — bondage, role play, sensory, and more.
Rate each activity
One at a time, rate activities as Yes, Maybe, or No. Take your time.
Review your results
Get a clear summary of interests and limits. Share with your partner when ready.
Questions
Frequently asked
What is a BDSM boundary checklist?
A BDSM boundary checklist is a communication tool that helps partners clearly express their interests, limits, and boundaries around intimate activities. Each partner rates activities as Yes (interested), Maybe (curious but uncertain), or No (hard limit), creating a shared understanding before any exploration begins.
Is my data private?
Absolutely. BeforeWePlay stores all your data locally on your device. Nothing is sent to our servers. Your checklist results never leave your browser unless you explicitly choose to share them.
Do I need to create an account?
No. You can use the Boundary Checklist Builder without any account, email, or personal information. Your privacy is our priority.
Can I compare results with my partner?
Yes! Each partner can complete the checklist independently, then compare results to find mutual interests while respecting hard boundaries. Only activities where both partners said Yes or Maybe are highlighted.
Is this just for BDSM?
While our first tool focuses on BDSM boundaries, BeforeWePlay is building tools for all types of intimate exploration, including threesome readiness assessments, aftercare planners, and more.
Learn more
Explore our guides
In-depth educational resources on BDSM practices, safety, and communication.
Ready to start the conversation?
Build your boundary checklist in under 10 minutes. Free, anonymous, and completely private.
Start your checklist→